The Adventures of Padman - Chapter One

Some time ago, in a place far away, a seventeen year old boy was eagerly awaiting the final stages of an immensely complicated procedure. As the letter of prime importance was unsealed and opened, he whooped up with joy. The news was good. He had been accepted as a student in the nineteenth best engineering college in India.


And so, he packed his bags and entered the plane. Excited with the enormity of possibilities that lay ahead of him, he thought longingly about his new home. The air hostess, with seamless professionalism, asked him, "More lime, Mr. Wow." Lost in thoughts, Wow could not register the carefully worded statement immediately. In the time lost, the air hostess got irritated to a magnitude much larger than the occasion could possibly have warranted... She was having her periods. It was then that it happened. Wow felt an abnormal occurence in his stomach, and it was not the stuff adrenaline was made up of. After intense retrospection, he figured that the pain was somewhere far below. He could feel stuff coming out from under him. He was actually feeling her pain. The feeling was so surreal that he even put his hand inside to check if there was anything there. He was surprised at not finding any muck there.


This sequence of events complicated matters further. The beautiful air hostess incorrectly inferred that he was actually playing with himself. At this inopportune moment, she also happened to suffer a mega mood swing. What eventually effected was that she splashed the lime on Wow's pants. There is a certain definitiveness in the way in which a nut cracker splits a nut into two. That is exactly how she cracked. After this, she walked away, elegance back in her gait. But, for Wow, the moment had gone. He was himself again. He started searching the skies for the answer to the incredible experience he had just had... He found none.